Most of the time, a number of people say that: “Avoid extramarital affairs, just divorce if you’re unhappy.” That advice sounds simple. But it ignores how divorce actually works in my culture.
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So let me tell you about it.
Here, marriage is tied to the cattle paid as dowry. If a woman divorces, her family must repay the entire dowry. But most women are not financially empowered. Many are housewives with no independent income. We did not pay the dowry ourselves, and we did not control how it was used. In many cases, that dowry was already shared and used by brothers to marry their own wives.
So when problems arise in a marriage, “just divorce” is not a real option for many women. You are often left with two choices: endure the marriage no matter how painful it is, or find another man while still married, someone who can repay the dowry and then marry you.
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Marriage Through the Eyes of Millennials and Gen-Z
In such a system, extramarital relationships are not always about a lack of morals. They are often shaped by economic dependence and cultural structures that make dignified exit nearly impossible.
With this reality in mind, it is worth asking: what realistic options do such women truly have?
—Jessica
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