I met Yaw online. He is a very funny man who knows how to make me laugh until my stomach hurts. All I have to do is say I am sad, and boom, he is cracking a joke. That is how something started online for us. I had never set my eyes on him, just the pictures and videos we exchanged, plus the countless messages we sent back and forth.
Well, early this year I finally put a clear face to the person I have been talking to. Such a fine man, I must say. He came for his sister’s funeral and I met him there. Turns out, I am a friend of the family but had never met him before.
Things escalated pretty quickly after our meeting. He proposed that I be his girlfriend. Seeing that I had already come to like him, trust me when I say I did not waste time screaming yes to his proposal. I did not see the point in pretending I needed days or weeks to think about it when my heart already knew the answer.
Yaw is a gentle man. He holds the car door open for me. Whenever I am sick, he becomes restless until he knows I am feeling better. Above everything, he is a man who knows and loves God genuinely.
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To me, there is something beautiful about being with someone who takes his faith seriously. He does not joke with his spiritual life or mine. He prays for me over the phone when I am not feeling well, and before we make important decisions, he seeks God first.
Everything about him, even the smallest things, get to me in a simple way. It does not feel weird or forced. I see it and I love it.
So far, our courtship has been going well. We have talked about almost everything concerning marriage: where we will live, our finances, our responsibilities, and even the smallest details about building a life together.
We have plans to get married either in December or early next year, as God wills. But then we reached one conversation that has left us stuck: our genotype.
I am AC. I was already sure, but I went to the hospital again just to confirm, and the results still came back as AC. The problem is that Yaw is AS.
Now we are here, deeply in love, but unsure of how far this love can go because of our genotype compatibility.
We have done the maths. My boyfriend is worried that our first child could have the SC genotype, which can come with serious health challenges. We know the chances of having an SC child are twenty-five percent, but the question is: can we take that risk? Are we prepared for the rainy and rough days? Can our love survive it? Is it wise enough?
Do the children deserve to suffer that way because we love each other a little bit too much? Is it safe enough? Will God even be happy with us? Will our children ever forgive us if they found out they had a chance to be born into the world with so many complications? I do not have the answers for these questions.
But then again, God will not give me battles He is aware I cannot handle. He gives us wisdom to make our decisions. But when love comes into the mix, you know the mess it brings. I am conflicted.
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Our plan is to have a maximum of three children, but this fear has made us question everything. Should we allow love to conquer this challenge, or should we walk away from a relationship that has been so meaningful because of this possibility?
Is there a way to know for certain what the outcome could be before making such a life-changing decision?
I need advice because we are stuck between love and the reality of what our future children could face. Doctors, nurses, everyone please come on board. Help me.
— Naomi
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